You Know You're In Band When
by Tenuto07
Summary: Overused topic but it's funny. Gotta love the band :
1. Chapter 1

You know you're in band when...  
>BD- Band Director DM- Drum Major<p>I read a lot of these and I just HAD to make one. Most of these relate to me and the marching band i'm in and some other ones I took from other people. I'm an oboe player, but for marching season and pep band I end up doing percussion and my best friends are in guard and drumline. Oh yeah, one of my good friends is a DM too! The rest are just regular band student... so yep I know like everyone's pain...<p>

1) You play the song "Sweet Caroline" for pep band and hate the cymbal part because your arms hurt like hell and the song is really long

2) You talk to your non-band friends about band and they smile and nod but don't seem to care

3) Your instrument has a name

4) Your in gym class and your roll-step instead of walk/run

5) Your in gym class and when your teacher tells you to backwards skip or backwards lunge, you relave instead

6) Someone calls you a "band geek" and you just smile and nod.

7) Someone calls you a "band geek" and your proud of it

8) Your marching shoes all of a suddely become comfortable

9) You have been hit with a flag/instrument more times than you can count

10) You don't mind the taste of your reed

11) You freak out if someone moves your instrument the billionth of a centemeter

12) You urge youreslf to go to school just because band always makes your day

13) Every person you want to date is in band

14) All of your friends are in band

15) You complain all the time about how terrible marching season is, but once it's over, you miss it

16) You pass people in the hall and you don't know them but you know they are in band, but once you get to band class, you talk to them like you've known them forever

17) You know what everyone plays and what grade their in, but yet you do not know their name

18) You spend your week days at school practicing and your weekends at competitions

19) You spend all of your free time practicing

20) You love to mess with the BD

21) You want to freaking push Dr. Beat off a cliff

22) You can do your whole show in your head

23) You can play every single note correctly, march exactly where your supposed to go, and can do every visual 2 months after marching season ends

24) If you are in pit, you try every possible way to hide behind the DM so the sun doesn't get in your eyes while you play

25) The drumline has made their own song up by using repetitive lyrics

26) You absolutely HATE the other band in your division, but yet you wish them luck when you pass them (We're a Class AAAA division; I know the pain when other schools ** wins cause there just that good)

27) You cheer when your band gets last place in your division

28) Someone has stolen valve oil and sprayed it all over the band room

29) The football field is no longer for football- it was made for marching.

30) Half time is the "big moment"

31) "One more time" NEVER means "One more time"

32) You see your section more than your own family

33) You store EVERYTHING in your band locker

34) Your fingers freeze to the position you play your instrument at night rehersals

35) Underarmour is your best friend during band camp

36) Band Camp is the highlight of your summer

37) Sunglasses are your best friend during sunny rehersals

38) Water is your life saver

39) In your freshman year, you go to your first day of school and you know a lot of people because of band camp

40) One of your best friends is an upperclass man

41) Your summer consists of band camp and your school days consist of band

42) You hate concert season and only do it just to see what next year's show is

43) Solo and Ensemble is a waste of your weekend

44) You hate the people who can care less about learning music/band class

45) The best meal you can get at a football game is a cup of hot chocolate and a bag of skittles

46) Your lucky if you get to eat dinner at home on a day of a football game

47) Your Ipod is filled with this year's show music

48) You swear your uniform is bullet proof because it's so thick

49) You call your hat a "helmet"

50) Your band and the opposing band always has a competition to see who's band is better during football games

51) "Dynamics" are another word for "suggestion"

52) You play the loudest you can until your BD yells at you

53) You have attempted to shoot your annoying instructor with a airsoft pen XD (this one's an inside joke)

54) The whole band has many inside jokes

55) Your nervous for every competition- except state

56) State is the most fun comptetion

57) You own at least 3 band shirts

58) You keep an extra set of warm clothes in your band locker just for marching season

59) You own at least 10 heat warmers for competitons

60) You wear your uniform's jacket when your cold after you performed at a competition

61) You freak out when someone has your instrument in your hands until you remember that you had them hold it for you

62) Every Friday is "band shirt Friday"

63) You have done more push ups than the football team

64) During your freshman year, you don't think you can memorize your music, but then you end up memorizing the whole show in your head

65) The phrase "Armed Guard" means girls with flags, not guys with guns

66) The pit and the drumline has broken at least 3 pairs of mallets in a week

67) When your drumming and you drop a drumstick, you stare at it while drumming with one drumstick and using your fingers as a replacement

68) You BOOK IT to your instrument so you have time to play a song during pep band

69) There are these evil little things that you like to call a "dot book"

70) Most of your stories start with "that one time during band" or "today during band camp"

71) Your family and friends are past irritated with your band stories

72) There are 3 busses: the band bus, the drumline bus, and the guard bus

73) You sing your show during class and you get weird stares

74) Band is the highlight of your day

75) Band and candy canes don't mix

76) Keeping a "Nintendo 64" in your band locker is completely normal

77) You have a ton of leftover food from marching season

78) You try to hide your phone from your BD and text when he's not looking

79) You have thought about becoming a DM

80) Your rifle has a name

81) Quitting band is like commiting suicide

82) Bus rides are epic

83) Singing random songs after a competition on the bus is completey normal

84) Breaking a drumhead is completely normal

85) Music is your LIFE

86) Your band director knows just about everything about every band member

87) You can sleep right next to the drumline while there practicing

88) Your a master of sleeping on the bus in an uncomfortable position when it's really noisy

89) Your band marches better in the rain XD (My band does; we're masters at it)

90) You can change into your uniform in 2 minutes. Tops.

91) You and your friends plan weeks earlier to take your Nintendo DS's to a competition so you can use the download play to play Mario Kart or any other game (My friends and I did that and we had soooo much fun)

92) Being called a hooker isn't offensive

93) You heard the drumline play your show music so much, you can play/dance to your whole show by just getting the beat

94) Every section often has a fight about which section is better

95) After you try out for drumline and make it, you NEVER want to go back to pit

96) During concert season, the whole band actually tries when another teacher walks in the room, but when they leave, the band decides to suck at playing again

97) During concert season, your BD always complains that the band doesn't sound good and they need to try harder for your upcoming concert when you only play 3 or less songs

98) You automatically hate any band that is better than yours in your division

99) Your band locker is your second room

100) You took the time to read this list (I'm not stopping now though)

101) Your BD gets stricter on upcoming events

102) Band can get really boring sometimes, especially when whatever the BD talks about doesn't apply to your section

103) You have an A in band and F in math

104) The upperclass men make fun of the freshman just for entertainment, but the freshman know it's just a joke

105) Homecoming is coming up and your DM is being voted for Homcoming King/Queen and the band knows that your DM has the band behind them so they automatically win

106) The first day of band camp is super fun and the next day is tiring and boring as hell

107) The BD knows the band isn't paying any attention when the DM's call "set" and he takes a few minutes to admire whatever your looking at (Ex. Double Rainbows right after a light shower XD)

108) Someone calls "set" out of nowhere and your head automatically snaps up

109) Someone calls "Detail, atten hut!" and everyone in band shouts "Hut!"

110) During pep band, there's always one person who brings a portable video game with them and plays when you don't have to play music

111) When the pep band is practicing, right before the whole band is about to play, the percussion play the beat to the upcoming song and sing if there are lyrics to the song (Ex. *Plays beat to "Don't Stop Believin'* Percussion- "DON'T STOP BELIEVIN'!)

112) You go to bed really late, wake up really early, go to band camp, run only on water and a bag of snacks for the whole day, and yet you can last and play your instrument for the whole entire time.

113) Someone talks bad about band, you all of a suddenly become very defensive

114) You spend your lunch in the band room talking to your band geek friends and the BD

115) If the Jazz band starts really early, you are willing to wake up to play

116) The DM's have seniority over EVERYTHING but the BD

117) You are friends with one or all of the DM'S

118) Your summer life consists of: Wake up, do whatever, get ready for band camp, leave, play, come home, sleep

119) Being early means your on time

120) Being late means your dead. Literally.

121) If you mess up during a competition on purpose, you will have 6 band members run around with knives attempting to murder you, burning your body, then drowning your ashes. They will also make your soul do push ups as a punishment

122) If you mess up during a a competition on purpose, the whole band will blame you for the low score the band got and make you do said pushups in # 121

123) If you talk during a competition, be prepared for your death

124) Your BD sees EVERYTHING when you rehearse on the field.

125) Letters past G don't matter

126) Competitions are fun

127) You convince your boy/girlfriend or your best friend to join band so you can see them more often, but you end up not seeing them at all after they join

128) Marching season is the highlight of your school year

129) When your a freshman during band camp and don't know the school at all, by the time school starts you know the whole school because of sectionals

130) Someone unplugs Dr. Beat and plays their Ipod instead

131) After 2 competitions, Dr. Beat is officially useless for the year

132) The percussion gets many sets of new mallets for the year and they end up breaking by the time marching season is only half over (That happened to us and boy, was our instructor ready to kill us)

133) When someone messes up the order of the mallets for each instrument, you want to murder them

134) Hats/sunglasses are a MUST for marching season

135) After football season ended, you have absolutely nothing else to do on your Fridays

136) NOTHING matters after state

137) Everyone tries for marching season, but when it comes to concert season, nobody cares.

138) During concert season, the word "try" is equivilant to "fail"

139) You don't try out to be in the upper band because it requires a lot of work

140) The pit gets their fair share of marching by pushing all the equitment onto the field

141) When the sprinklers pop out of the ground to water the grass, the #1 goal for the pit is to cover the instruments and make a run for it

142) Your dot book is officially a part of your pants

143) If you play the sax, you shove your music into the hole so you don't have to hold it

144) For oboe players: other instrument players just don't understand how terrible it is when your reed breaks

145) You walk down the hall with your band friends and you can keep time with them

146) You HATE it when someone doesn't walk in time with you

147) You always start walking on your left foot

148) You know about everyone's love life

149) Everyone knows about your love life

150) You keep a part of your instrument with you at all times

151) You go through reeds like there's no tomorrow

152) Your lung capacity in band is HUGE, but when you get to gym class, it dies and becomes super small

153) You pass the practice field and think about how much you hate it

154) You pass the practice field and think of all your 'good' memories of it

155) When it rains, the drumline makes a giant pit of mud in one place

156) When a person on drumline play during concert season on a concert snare, they jam out on it and their teacher yells at them saying it's not drumline anymore

157) What's considered weird to your non-band friends is considered normal to you

158) All the seniors are depressed after state because they just played their last show

159) Sleeping on top of your friends on the band bus is totally normal

160) You try so hard not to mess up so you don't have to do the push ups that go with it as punishment

161) Your still reading this list

162) When you listen to the judge talk about what your band has done well, needs to improve, and what was bad, and he/she doesn't stop talking, you and your friends wonder if he/she even breathes

163) Your life can be depressing, annoying or irritating, and yet band class can cheer you up

164) You use proper names for instruments (Xylophone, Marimba, Vibraphone)

165) All pit players have to explain to their friends that not all of the instruments are xylophones

166) Having only 1 meal per day is normal

167) You hate the fact that your uniform is so thick and hot in the summer, but once it hits fall it becomes your life saver

168) There are earbuds hanging from the band room ceiling and your not going to ask how they got up there

169) There is a reason why the band joined band, not choir

170) Your BD tells the trumpets to play a certain part and you put down your instrument, saying "this will take a while..."

171) Sitting as a group and having your DM'S and BD talk to you during band camp or rehersal is reffered to "story time"

172) If someone in percussion forgets their drumsticks, you know there screwed for the day

173) Marching band will always be harder than football

174) The word "privacy" is non-existant

175) When two people are still in the band room while everyone is on the field, they come walking out and your BD threatens the last one with 10 push ups if they don't make it in time so they sprint so they don't have to

176) You have a beautiful "band tan" and your proud of it

177) Your BD tells eveyone that they have to have their music memorized by the time band camp starts and when it starts nobody has it memorized

178) You spend more than 12 hours at school

179) The "first day of school" is the same as, "welcome back, we haven't seen you for a whole week!"

180) You thought your band did really well in a competition and you listen to the other band in your division and say... fail... 


	2. Chapter 2

Here's a few more that I thought of! I'm still coming up with some more but I thought you guys would like to read on! I give credit to Moonstar2015!

181) You had no idea how to play football and now you do because you watch your team play

182) For the whole time, you've been holding cymbals wrong and now your shirt is cut open

183) Your school has no cymbal line so you and your friend are the two official members

184) You hope that your team doesn't score so you can sit there and talk to your friends

185) When they do score, you stand up, play, and sit back down and continue the conversation like nothing happend

186) You don't explain people by saying, that boy with the brown hair and green eyes, but you explain them like: you know, sophomore, brownish hair and blue eyes, trumpet, 2nd in wind

187) Your friend pulls a prank that involves taking apart their instrument and hiding all of their music

188) You don't know rain until you've marched in it.

189) It has rained during a competition before. Only for your show.

190) You and everyone else thinks its romantic to see your bf/gf in band camp

191) The pit doesn't play with the color guard. They dodge them.

192) You have a percussionist who keeps a freaking huge tub of animal crackers in his locker and shares them with the fellow band

193) Your percussion friends start feasting on them and the BD catches her eating them and tells her she has to vaccum the band room as a punishment using the janitor's vaccum

194) You watch her for 10 minutes vaccuming and you stand there laughing

195) POKE! With a capital "H" ... need I say more?

196) Your best friend on drumline keeps a bottle of axe in his backpack

197) You hate every scale known to mankind except for one: Bb scale

198) You have a friend who kicks cymbals in order for them not to fly off the drum cart on the day of state because it's so windy out

199) You, for the first time in your life, did your final show in the day time

200) ALL percussionists have or almost have ADHD. Even if they are an honors student.

201) You've bitten on a broken reed to see what happens

202) It doesn't break

203) One of the trumpets decides he doesn't want to play so he walks out of band when the BD's not looking

204) Fifteen minutes later, the BD finally notices that he's gone and gives him a 0% for his daily grade

205) Five minutes after that, he decides to come back just at the wrong time- the BD is working with the trumpet section

206) So he sneaks around the pillars of the cafeteria like a ninja and runs to his seat when the BD's not looking (the upper band has the band room and your locked out of the FAC)

207) The whole band is laughing because she doesn't notice until 10 minutes later and decides to give him a lecture

208) There is the little rule in band if the teachers ever see anything of yours lying around and they have to pick it up:  
>a. You have to sing "I'm a Little Teapot" with motions in front of the whole band b. You have to bring food for the whole band c. You get a phone call home.<p>

209) There is two people (an alto and of course, a percussionist) who never brought in food.

210) And it's been a whole month

211) You have a friend who plays cowbell for pep band and texts the whole time

212) Your BD stops in the middle of the song when the band is actually playing well and doesn't stop when it's a complete disaster

213) Freshman orientation is a fun game the pit plays during sectionals during break

214) Your percussion friends have a 'triangle duet' and its a horrible disaster

215) You and your section doesn't even know how the hell they messed up a triangle duet

216) Your section consists of two people: you and your friend

217) Your friends with your BD on Facebook

218) You and your friends have had a plan to end the show with shattering percussion mallets, flaming sax's, and electric trumpets

219) There is a group on Facebook that you are a part of that is titled: 'The Band Geeks of _ High School'

220) There is only one place/event where you need to drink water the fastest: Pep band

221) You and your friends stay after school just because there's pep band

222) The whole entire drumline keeps a bottle of Axe in their backpack

223) You have to write a speech about yourself and you have a whole paragraph written just on the band

224) You and your friends spend hours just ranting about how much the drumline and color guard instructors annoy you

225) And one or more of those people aren't even in band

226) Your non-band friends just don't understand your love for band and they never will unless they join

227) The terms: Fingering, push in and pull out aren't dirty

228) The phrase: "Where are my sticks?" from a percussionist isn't dirty

229) You get to conduct in front of the whole band and nobody listens to you at first

230) Then you say "hey guys..." and nobody hears you

231) Then you say a little louder, "Heyyyy!" then they stop for a second and talk again

232) Then you get to shout "HEYYYYYY!" and they all stop talking and listen to you

233) Your supposed to be conducting in 4/4 but then you forgot how to conduct so you end up in 3/4

234) When you cut them off to stop, they listen to you better than the real BD

Moonstar2015's 235) You spend all your free time in the band room

236) You can't wait till you can drive so you can come/leave the band room whenever you feel

Tenuto07's 237) Your username/password have to do something with band

238) Your non-band friends think its cute when a guy gives a girl chocolates or flowers, but you think its cuter if they do a cover of your favorite song for you

239) And you don't care how bad it is or what instrument it's on

240) Even if it is on a drum kit 


	3. Chapter 3

I forgot to mention in chapter 2... I'm pretty sure you don't know what the FAC is unless you go to my school. The FAC is short for the Fine Arts Center and it's where the whole district holds major events like plays, choir/band concerts, stuff like that. So yeah, just clearing that up. And once again, Moonstar2015 is helping me again! So thanks, I run out of ideas sometimes and wait until band class to write them so I have things to write about and getting extra help helps a lot! So please feel free to review a few more for me and I'll give you the credit!

Moonstar2015's

241) You can fit at least 3 people in your band locker (the big ones of course, nobody can fit into a flute locker!)

242) Half the editors for your school newspaper are in band

243) Most of those pictures are taken in the band room by band students

244) On the first day of band camp, your BD tells you not to throw stuff in the tuba

245) The whole band does it anyways

246) So they have to cover up the opening

Tenuto07's

247) Your locked out of the band room before pep band when you stay after school cause the BD goes home for a bit

248) So you and your other percussion friends decide to take out a snare drum and bang on the snare, a stool, and of course, a table

249) Your Communication Arts/ English teacher is the teacher for drama and she's down the other hall that leads to the stage

250) Your in the hallway banging on above items and you hear her shouting and walking down the hallway

251) You RUN for your life

252) You have your friend check if she's still there (She walked away lol)

253) Since the ski club and the play/pit orchestra are on the same night as pep band, your pep band for the night consists of 5 percussionists, 6 flutes, 3 sax's, 1 trombone, 1 bass clarinet, 1 tuba, and 6 trumpets

254) It was the saddest pep band you've ever gone to

255) You can play 120 by heart

256) You know what 120 is

257) Everyone wants to kill the other football team... And you and the band want to kill the other bands

258) When you sing the alphabet, you go a, b, c, d, e, f, g, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, a, b, c, d, e, f, g, a, b, c, d, e, f, g...

259) You carry cork grease/valve oil in your pocket

260) You use cork grease as chapstick

261) Paying for basketball/football games is overrated (You get in for free!)

262) There are 4 types of people: The band geeks, the non-band people, the choir nerds, and the orchadorks

263) When you and your friend are talking to your non-band friend, she says, so this one time... and you and your band friend say at the same time, at band camp?

264) Put a plume in it (Not put a sock in it)

265) Non-band people cheer for things like football teams and horse racing, but your cheering for DCI

266) Your excuse for everything is, sorry I've got band tonight

267) You wear your uniform jacket on the way back from competitions because it's cold

268) You've been hanging around too many drummers

269) You and your friends use your reed case and throw it up into the air for the whole hour

270) The BD doesn't even notice

271) Your BD's height does not affect his aggressiveness

272) Eyepatches have nothing to do with pirates

273) Percussion: Side effects may include:  
>-Loss of hearing -ADDADHD (If you don't already have it)  
>-Short attention span<p>

274) One of your friends is conducting and she's shouting at everyone that they need to have their instruments in their hands in order to play

275) One of the trumpets shout, "What? What sorcery is this?"

276) Your music can get stuck in your head easily

277) *Dr. Beat* Non-band people: "what is that random clicking noise?" Band people: "there's a clicking noise?"

278) You almost don't want to go to band when you have a sub

279) You look up "sleep" in the dictionary just to see if it's really a word in the English language

280) You don't lock your band locker because it's a waste of time and nobody in the band would steal anything

281) Some idiot locks your locker and you flip out because you don't remember the combo

282) You figure it out and you tell everyone that the next person who locks your locker will die

283) You have more trophies than the football team 


	4. Chapter 4

Hey everyone!  
>This is pretty much what I have for now. - notice the 'for now' part. I read the reviews. :) Keep reviewing guys it makes me happy of what you guys think. And also, I'm here to clear a few things up:<br>Sorry, I thought everyone knew what Dr. Beat was. I thought it was a universal term (which it actually is, I googled it)

Dr. Beat is the most annoying thing invented in band ever. (Okay, my own opinion, but I think most people can agree with me) It's pretty much a metronome (a met as my friends and I call it) that's plugged into a giant megaphone so when your marching, the whole band can hear it over your playing. It's quite annoying. (Did I mention this already?)

If you guys need to know anything else, review and I'll try to explain.

Oh yes, if you guys didn't notice yet, I do put a lot of random things in this list like my stories from band... so I guess some of these don't really relate to you unless you go to my school and actually know who/what I'm talking about. So, sorry about that; I'll try to write more non-inside joke related stuff in here. I'm also thinking about keeping a... journal? Log? Idk, something about my band camp experience next season and posting it on FF for you guys to read if you absolutely want to. So... yeah... review or pm me if you want me to do that then. Enjoy the new list!

284) You go on a band trip with the band (Okay, who else would you go with on a band trip?) and your teacher lets you roam free at 10:30 pm around a town

285) Then you and your friend's get lost and your band directorless

286) You can fall asleep listening to jazz. Even if it's live. ...Especially when it's live

287) You fall asleep on your friend on the bus going to a competition, a band field trip, or at a concert. And it's totally normal

288) When someone falls during marching season/band camp, the first thing you do is ask the marcher if their instrument is okay

289) Anything below forte to a trumpet is a type-o

290) You learn the other section's part of a song... just because you want to

291) The BD breaks his own rules

292) The administration always questions the BD because he/she didn't mark you absent when you didn't show up to school that day

292) You can go through a whole month of just band clothes (And no, your uniform doesn't count)

293) The band room comes equipped with awesome things, such as microwaves, refrigerators/freezers and toasters

294) The BD: Who cares what the weather is outside? ONE MORE TIME!

295) You learned a LONG time ago, sleeping by drummers isn't always the best idea

296) You go to football games just for the grade (Okay, and the band. You can't stay away from them for too long...)

297) It's the week right after marching season and the band switches from marching to concert like nothing happend

298) The band is louder than the fans at a home game

299) EVERYONE in the band is easily entertained. It's how you lost most of your attention span

300) Weather is overrated

301) Your BD has connections with everyone

302) Being sleep deprived is completely normal

303) You have a habit of tucking your zipper in on your jacket/sweatshirt because you're required to do this to your uniform 304) You can no longer listen to the national anthem without hearing the beginning few beats of your school song

305) You tap your pencil on your desk during class and it takes you a whole 5 minutes to realize your drumming the year's cadence

306) You have a neck strap on for your school picture

307) Your BD gives you a lesson on how to use a stand

308) You help the percussion move the equiptment (Cause who knows how long it can take them?)

309) Your other BD (the one that nobody likes) spends the whole class doing warm ups and you have 10 minutes left of class to play one song

310) Your BD has a list on the board of songs to play and the band only gets through 1

311) When buying a car, you make sure that your instrument can fit before anything

312) You end up in the hospital for a band-related injury (You see, I was doing a jazz run, but I didn't see the piccalo player behind me...)

313) You can remember every note to every single show you've marched in but you can't remember anything from the class lessons the day before

314) You know the pitch of the school bell

315) Your dreams consists of the band or marching on the field

316) Skipping class = let's head to the band room!

317) You don't really like talking to non-band people because they don't understand half the things you say

318) You hate it when you set your music on a stand, pull it up, and then... BAM! Your music explodes all around you!

319) You have a solo... you play it correctly until you realize... you came in one measure early and you get so mad you wanna just flip a table

320) You and the band still laugh when the teacher says "okay, and there's a ritard here..." although you know it's super immature

321) Anything in middle school band didn't happen

322) You have a burial service for your reed and it consists of taking it, snapping it in half, and chucking it in the garbage can

323) You count the days down until band camp

324) You're so proud of being part of your band, you wear/have band apparel

325) You're roaming the halls in the school and decide to roll step around instead of walking

326) You almost miss the lecture during marching season before a competition of "You have your uniforms? Hats? Plumes? Black socks? Shoes? Gloves? Instrument on the truck? We're set!"

327) You wear your marching shoes to every formal occasion just because they are nice looking, minus the dirt and mud on them

328) Who needs dress shoes when you've got spectacular marching shoes?

329) Your BD always lets you out two minutes before the bell, and you realize that you still have to put your stand, chair, and instrument away

330) It's physically impossible to play a xylo/marimba/vibes while reading the score

331) You know the little fun fact: all American car horns are tuned to F

332) Graduation consists of playing Pomp and Circumstance 53235 times in one day

333) Months after marching season ends, you go through your band locker and find 3 bottles of bug spray

334) Never louder than lovely! 


End file.
